So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
Randomize