How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
So many bounce houses so little time
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
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