just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
For new year's, we should just keep our resolution simple and keep accomplishing burpees in heels.... while drunk.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
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