I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
