Come see our sink grown plant.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
Randomize
