I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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