How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Randomize
