I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
My feet surprised me
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
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