i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
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