Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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