Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
