Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
