I didn't shave. On purpose
just come out here and I will go home with you...
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
