so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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