and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
He put oyster crackers in his ramen noodles. Is that a thing? Because holy shit I had never thought of it before and if it's not a thing he's my new stoner hero for discovering it.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
