I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Randomize
