I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Operation Purity has been aborted
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
