After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
