My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Randomize