everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
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