I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
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