I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Randomize
