i don't plan on having that self control this summer
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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