he wants to bone in the snuggie
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
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