The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
