it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
