The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Last night the nurse at the ER told me that she wished all her drunk patients were like me. Then she commented on my socks...
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Why is there bacon in the couch?
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
