Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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