i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
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