maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
