So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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