Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
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We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
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