all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
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