If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
