Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Randomize
