So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
