Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
ok give me a pep talk, I want a hotdog but I'm too stoned to go make it
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
Randomize
