Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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