She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
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surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
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By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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