what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
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