Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
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both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
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They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
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