I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
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then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
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Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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