He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
