Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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