Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Randomize
