If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
