Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
