How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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