she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
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Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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