I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
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in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
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Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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