I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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